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The Onion Horoscope for Aug 31st
01 Sep 2010 11:58 #1
by ScienceChic
"Now, more than ever, the illusions of division threaten our very existence. We all know the truth: more connects us than separates us. But in times of crisis the wise build bridges, while the foolish build barriers. We must find a way to look after one another as if we were one single tribe.” -King T'Challa, Black Panther
The truth is incontrovertible. Malice may attack it. ignorance may deride it, but in the end, there it is. ~Winston Churchill
The Onion Horoscope for Aug 31st was created by ScienceChic
http://www.theonion.com/articles/your-h ... 010,17999/
Scorpio You'll lose both legs in a railroad accident next month, but luckily they'll only be prosthetic replacements for the ones you'll lose at the zoo this Thursday.
Mental note, avoid the zoo tomorrow.
I like Cancer and Libra this week!
Cancer: Ultimately there will be nothing your friends can do for you, putting you in the position of having to find more competent friends.
Libra: You're through giving advice to people, to the vast relief of the park rangers tasked with pulling their charred husks out of the volcanoes.
Scorpio You'll lose both legs in a railroad accident next month, but luckily they'll only be prosthetic replacements for the ones you'll lose at the zoo this Thursday.
Mental note, avoid the zoo tomorrow.
I like Cancer and Libra this week!
Cancer: Ultimately there will be nothing your friends can do for you, putting you in the position of having to find more competent friends.
Libra: You're through giving advice to people, to the vast relief of the park rangers tasked with pulling their charred husks out of the volcanoes.
"Now, more than ever, the illusions of division threaten our very existence. We all know the truth: more connects us than separates us. But in times of crisis the wise build bridges, while the foolish build barriers. We must find a way to look after one another as if we were one single tribe.” -King T'Challa, Black Panther
The truth is incontrovertible. Malice may attack it. ignorance may deride it, but in the end, there it is. ~Winston Churchill
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