Been a while since I've been here... you're welcome SC! I've read a few posts off and on though and surprised more by topics not discussed. Anyway, I have a little story to tell that has changed my way of thinking and how I interact with people I don't know, in person or those who I rarely talk to about politics and American life.
I stayed home for 8 weeks and consulted with my mechanics from my home. Needless to say, that's not really an effective management strategy, but the owner knows my medical history, and my wife. Bullet dodged so far but I recently demanded my return to work. I never wanted to separated from my job but did manage to build a covered deck, so there was an upside. I was getting paid but he did quietly take a week of my vacation... I'm good with that.
Anyway, while building this deck, I got to know my neighbor a whole lot better. We always waved before but that was about it. He's a guy with a Bernie sign in his yard year round. I'm a guy with a 2000 Ford Excursion diesel that he likely hears every morning. He's a guy I just never wanted to get to know very well since that would likely end in a bad way if we ever talked politics. But, it was not the case and I was wrong.
He saw me struggling with plywood I was putting up on the new rafters and offered to help. Hell yeah, perfect timing. It only took a few minutes of his time but saved me from possibly wrecking myself if the ladder didn't cooperate. I gave my thanks and offered a beer, which he accepted.
Ok, enough backstory. Bottom line is we talked for about an hour and a six pack. Toward the end, the conversation went from the virus and all this Twilight Zone bs to politics. Maybe 15 minutes of debating whether or not Trump or Biden would be best suited to bring back the country from this nightmare. He's a Bernie guy so isn't happy about Biden but he really can't stand Trump... not surprising. We found out what we already knew about each other and after an elbow bump, he was on his way. A couple days later he called me over to offer some of his beer. I needed the break and we ended up talking for quite a while and mostly politics. We both had much of the same feelings about what needs to be done in country to get us back on track, but there was some pretty major differences is how those goals could get accomplished. That didn't ,matter though. We both talked to each other the way we talk to our good friends and family. He jokingly said I wasn't the asshole he thought I was and as I was laughing I thought the same about him.
About a week later he invited me to a poker game at his house with a few of his buddies. I was happily surprised that only 1 of the 3 was a Democrat... not because I didn't want to hang out with a bunch of lefties, but because this guy had two conservative friends. There wasn't as much political talk but enough to know these guys found a way to talk about politics without having to verbally punch each other in the face. So, I have 5 new friends thanks to this virus.... bonus #2.
This all made me instantly realize I've been doing it wrong on this site for a long time. I think I started out doing it right but I let a couple people get to me (members not here currently), and turn me into the guy I would normally hate ... on the internet anyway. I used this place to vent my frustrations about politicians and the media, which is fine, but I was doing it wrong because it wasn't the real me. The real me has always had friends who were liberals/progressives/Democrats, as well as both of my parents. This shutdown and destruction of our economy will either continue to accelerate our ideological divides or it will bring us together as Americans. I have no optimism when it comes to our political "leaders" ever getting along or the media practicing journalism, but I can start doing my part.
I still want to understand the other side so I won't stop posting what disturbs me, pisses me off, or what I find unbelievably stupid, but I will do it like we do at our bi-weekly poker nights.
Lastly (if you're still reading this) I'd like to publicly apologize to you SC. This is your place and I was invited here. I've never invited someone to my house who I knew was an asshole, but I have invited a couple who I found out were assholes and racists. I've been an asshole, and I'm sorry.
You all can feel free to quote me when I say the old me has retired and won't return. Hope you're all well and I'm looking forward to talking soon.
It was always the women, and above all the young ones, who were the most bigoted adherents of the Party, the swallowers of slogans, the amateur spies and nosers−out of unorthodoxy
I’m glad you posted this Rick. One of my best friends in the world was a lefty who I met because of a stupid bumper sticker he had. We used to talk politics late into the night while drinking and, while we disagreed, we never argued. We both had good points and wanted what was best for the country. I came in here swinging also but surprisingly have found I like some of the lefties here. I’ve toned it down quite a lot but I’m sure some still consider me an asshole. Well, the shoe fits, but I’ll try to remember to talk to y’all like I used to talk to my friend.
I posted a MIA about U...(a little worried)....I am elated to see U back.
Your eloquent ,enlighten narrative is refreshing and honest and from my POV,THAT is why we are
experiencing this moment in time(a visitation of a virus.)
The truly important things are coming forward...humility,honesty an understanding that HUMANS are
multi faceted,capable of rising above the chaos and CHOOSING to change....for the better. IT is a
work in progress,we have not completed the task.
I speak of astrology and most are UN impressed....but the trends (transits) are manifesting for the
betterment of mankind....HOWEVER there is always free will and choosing "upside" is ultimately the goal.
We ALL bleed red blood, we ALL have a deep longing for a better outcome and we ALL aspire to accept
what can not be changed and find the grace to continue. GOOD to see U back
It's nice to see you back Rick, and to realize that you didn't disappear because you were sick. Some of us
were worried.
Apology accepted, and very much appreciated. Thank you for sharing your experiences with your neighbor, it's always my hope that we can share our own perspectives and debate various points of view civilly because we certainly can learn from one another. No one group has all the right answers, and though we don't always agree on how to solve problems, the similar goals we want to achieve, and values we hold dear, far outweigh our differences. Indeed, it is our differences that create our greatest strengths for we can overcome one another's weaknesses through understanding and compromise.
Your post reminded me of a few of my favorite quotes, which I've tried to keep in mind in running this Forum and when posting on my personal pages. Consider it for yourselves if you wish, or don't, though I would hope that we can all agree that more kindness, empathy, and considerateness would go a long way toward healing our divide. Thank you all for participating here, I am grateful for your time spent and thoughts you share.
"Being mean is easy- it's listening to those you disagree with that's hard." ~Dennis Herring
“If you resist reading what you disagree with, how will you ever acquire deeper insights into what you believe? The things most worth reading are precisely those that challenge our convictions.” ~Anonymous
"I never considered a difference of opinion in politics, in religion, in philosophy, as cause for withdrawing from a friend." ~Thomas Jefferson to William Hamilton, April 22, 1800
"The greatest good we can do our country is to heal its party divisions and make them one people." ~Thomas Jefferson, letter to John Dickinson, July 23, 1801
“Human kindness has never weakened the stamina or softened the fiber of a free people. A nation does not have to be cruel in order to be tough. The vigorous expression of our American community spirit is truly important. The ancient injunction to love thy neighbor as thyself is still the force that animates our faith—a faith that we are determined shall live and conquer in a world poisoned by hatred and ravaged by war.” ~President Franklin D Roosevelt, In a radio address for the Mobilization for Human Needs on October 13, 1940
"Now, more than ever, the illusions of division threaten our very existence. We all know the truth: more connects us than separates us. But in times of crisis the wise build bridges, while the foolish build barriers. We must find a way to look after one another as if we were one single tribe.” -King T'Challa, Black Panther
The truth is incontrovertible. Malice may attack it. ignorance may deride it, but in the end, there it is. ~Winston Churchill