Sheriff's Calls

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CanyonCourier created the topic: Sheriff's Calls 09 Nov 2018 16:40 #1

The gauntlet
CONIFER — To start at the beginning, Aphrodite doesn’t like Hera’s dog, Cerberus.

...on Oct. 20, Aphrodite was picking up her children from their play date and attempted to turn around in Hera’s driveway, getting stuck in the process and purportedly “knocking rocks from the rock wall” and “digging her tires into the road.” Hera called JCSO and asked deputies to banish Aphrodite from her driveway.

Thanks for listening
CONIFER — Daughter was furious with Mom and called JCSO so that deputies could be furious with Mom, too. Daughter called from a brand-new cell phone because she and Mom had recently gotten into (another) argument, and Mom had (cruelly and unfairly) removed Daughter’s old cell phone from her calling plan.

Three’s a crowd
EVERGREEN — Boyfriend and Girlfriend share a house with a male roommate. It was after 2 a.m. on Oct. 20 when Girlfriend and Roommate got done “drinking at the bars” and slopped home to find the side door locked. Girlfriend and Roommate found that “strange” because Boyfriend “never locks that door.”

When their drunken knocking finally persuaded Boyfriend to let them inside, Girlfriend observed that he came to the door “carrying the dog” and seemed “upset for some reason.”

A cigar is just a cigar
EVERGREEN — It seemed a small thing, she told deputies., but she feared the worst. A stranger had come to her door looking for his “Frisbee,” which he thought might have strayed into her backyard. However, the only way his Frisbee could only have strayed into backyard is if he’d been playing with it in her woody and precipitous neighborhood. Because her woody and precipitous neighborhood aren’t generally conducive to Frisbee-playing, she suspected the errant disc was nothing more than a transparent ruse by which he could “case” her house and grounds.

www.canyoncourier.com/content/sheriffs-calls-258

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  • Mountain Advisor
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CanyonCourier replied the topic: Sheriff's Calls 04 Jan 2019 17:38 #2

Remote con-trol
CONIFER — At first blush it all seemed straight up and five-by-five. The man who called on Dec. 12 claimed to represent the tech company she customarily consults on all matters computer. He recited the names of several IT agents who were familiar to her, and even referenced the correct date of her last service. He told her it was necessary to update her software, for which function he’d require remote access to her computer.

Unpacking heat
CONIFER — Back in 2015, she purchased a Smith & Wesson M&P 9mm handgun. A couple of years later she packed up the gun along with the rest of her belongings and moved into a friend’s house in Pleasant Park. Long about August of this year she decided her friend was, in fact, a jerk, and removed herself and her worldly possessions to an address in Denver. On Dec. 9, she finally got around to opening the carton containing her handgun only to find that it contained nothing of the sort.

Nothing to sneeze at
EVERGREEN — The good news is that on Dec. 11 the package he ordered online finally arrived. The bad news is that he found it sitting wide open on top of his mailbox.

Fare tonight, increasing clods by morning
EVERGREEN — After an evening spent partying heartily in the Queen City of the Plains, young Blutarsky prudently opted for a taxi ride home. Rather less prudently, he first insisted on sitting in front next to the driver, but was rebuffed by the equally prudent woman behind the wheel. Unfortunately, it’s a long trip from LoDo to South Jeffco, which gave Blutarsky ample time to chat up the long-suffering cabby, filling the vehicle with alcohol fumes and crude bluster, repeatedly caressing her shoulders, and persistently suggesting she “come inside and party with me.”

Find out the outcomes here: www.canyoncourier.com/content/sheriffs-calls-268

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