Quick and Easy Meals for One, Bachelor Style

Frito Pie, Individual Servings :

What you need to make it:

Bag of Fritos (individual size or larger depending on the individual)

Chili, canned or otherwise to ensure an exact ratio of 40/60 chili to chips, beans or no beans based on individual preference.

Chopped onion (you can scavenge from the COSTCO hot dog condiments if you buy a hot dog and bring a bag or container).

Shredded Cheddar cheese - enough so you can taste it in the mix (available at many salad bars).

Pickled jalapeno slices (available at many salad bars)

How to make it/additional resources:

Heat Chili, in the can it came in, or a pot, or microwave safe container. Consider the exhaust manifold of your vehicle as a heat source, you paid for the gas and you may as well get you money's worth! Timing is everything so if you are going under the hood to cook do it right after you get home from a long drive someplace else, you can keep the chili and chips in the car so you could even eat this on the way to somewhere if you wanted. If you do cook in the can make sure to puncture the lid so the can doesn't explode in your face and make sure to keep welding gloves and a pair of BBQ tongs or pliers handy!

Open bag of Fritos, add cheese, onions, jalapeno slices, and chili in that order. Ensure that you achieve a 40/60 chili to chips mix, you may need to wear a welding glove or strategically folded t-shirt to hold the bag while assembling the contents. Fold over the top of the open bag and shake until all ingredients are well mixed.

Swing by Taco Smell and liberate a few sporks, the spork is the optimal tool for this job! Again, pair this meal with an American Pilsner beer, Iron City, Blatz, or Buckhorn are good choices - you don't want to overpower the subtle flavor, textures, and subtle bouquet of this dish.

Best of all, clean up consists of throwing the empty containers in the trash and putting your tools back on the work bench - might be on the way to beer fridge depending on how your house is laid out. :thumbsup:

Tarte de Clochard (Hobo Pie)

What you need to make it[/u]

1 pound 30/70 ground beef (or 1 pound sliced top sirloin or 1 pound of cubed chicken thigh or breast - you will need to add oil too compensate for the lack of fat)

2 Russet or Yukon Gold potatoes, sliced thin

1 large carrot, sliced thin

1 yellow onion diced

salt, pepper to taste

two cloves of garlic minced

Optional: cayenne pepper, red pepper flakes

Tin Foil

How it's done[/u]

Put a double layer of tin foil down on a large flat surface, if you have to double or triple this recipe you may have to lock the dog out and assemble this on the floor. Start with the ground meat, form the meat in to a large flat rectangle, making sure to leave enough room to allow the foil to be sealed up into a package.

Next layer on the spuds, carrots, onions, and spices on last. Cover with an additional double layer of tin foil. Fold edges to form a sealed package.

Fire up the grill, or even better place in hot coals of a wood fire! You could also cook this in the oven; it should also be possible to cook a steak in a toaster. Heat source dictates cooking time so you do need to keep an eye on this if you are cooking on the grill or hot coals. finish off the cooking by turning the package over and letting the veggies get a little charred.

To serve put on your welding gloves and gently flip the package onto a cutting board or cookie sheet, tear off one corner of the foil package and allow excess fat to drain (best done outside, kinda messy).

Serve by tearing open the top layers of foil, can be eaten as is or you can break out the paper plates and sporks if you are trying to impress company. Shredded Cheddar, BBQ sauce, and ketchup are the appropriate accoutrement.

Kind of an every day meal so no need to pair this with anything fancy, Keystone light, Old Style, or Rolling Rock should do just fine!

Les pommes dans le papier d'aluminium (Apples in foil)

What you need to make it

Apples, core removed

Butter

Brown Sugar

Cinnamon

Nutmeg

Mace

How to make it

Cover cored apple with butter, combine sugar and spices in a bowl. Roll buttered apple in sugar and spices until coated, place apple on a square of foil and place a few small chunks of butter and remaining sugar and spices in the core. Wrap the apple in the foil, place in the coals of a fire or on the BBQ grill.

Cook until the apple is slightly softened, serve by placing the apple in a bowl, unwrapping the foil to capture the liquid, dice apple and cover in the melted butter, sugar, and spice mix. Also really good diced up on top of ice cream!

Great recipes. I would like to try that last one with a pear.

My personal favorite is the "bachelor salad". A bottle of salad dressing in one hand and a head of lettuce in the other, eaten over the kitchen sink.

Cinnamon rolls in Orange Peel

What you need:

1 can (tube?) cinnamon rolls - the kind you find in the refrigerated section with the biscuits at the grocery store

6 oranges

Tin foil

How to git'r dun:

Cut the first fifth off of the top of the orange, extract the insides using a spoon and taking care not to tear the rind. Open the cinnamon rolls and place one roll inside each orange rind, wrap in foil leaving some room for expansion.

Best cooked in coals from a wood fire but you can also cook on the grill or in the oven. Cooking time is dictated by the method of cooking and amount of heat from the source. In general these are done when you can smell the orange and cinnamon over the wood smoke and the foil packets have expanded to one and a half times the original size.

Remove from heat, allow a few minutes to cool then unwrap foil, peel off the orange rind, and enjoy!!

Huevos Rancheros, Ala Otis

What you need:

3 eggs
Re-fried beans
Shredded spuds
Diced onion
Shredded sharp cheese, cheddar and/or pepper jack are best
Flour tortillas
Pork based green chili
Bacon, sausage, ham, corned beef hash... Spam?
Oil from your favorite breakfast meat or oil of your choice
Salt, fresh ground black pepper, and powdered garlic to taste

What it takes to git'r done:

Break out the large skillet, preferably the well seasoned cast iron one. Either cook your favorite breakfast meat and reserve an appropriate amount of oil - or - pour the oil of your choice in to the skillet and per-heat.

Shred the spuds into hash browns, add the spuds and diced onions to the skillet and cook until golden brown on one side. Season with salt and pepper then flip and spice again, continue to cook until golden brown on both sides. Just before the hash browns are done add a flour tortilla on top of the hash browns, the idea is to warm the tortilla through. put the warmed tortilla on a plate and top with the hash browns.

Add the desired amount of refried beans to the skillet and warm through. Once the beans are warm top off the hash browns with the beans.

Crack and prepare the eggs to your liking, I like sunny side up or scrambled. Top off the beans and hash browns with the eggs and then cover with a copious amount of cheese. If you made breakfast meat now is the time to add it to the stack!

Add desired amount of green chili to the skillet and warm through. Once warm pour green chili over the stack. Toss on a bit more cheese if you are trying to impress company then dig in!

Best in the early morning when the weather is cold and the green chili is really hot and you don't need to be anywhere any time soon!

If consumed after 1200 beer is an appropriate accompaniment instead of coffee, siestas are mandatory after this meal no matter what!

If you work this out correctly the clean up can be limited to the skillet if you use a paper plate and plasticware (consult your local Taco Smell or similar fast food establishment), a grater or veg-o-matic, and a bowl and whisk if you want scrambled eggs. Why no specific measures of ingredients? This is another effort to use up the left overs and make a meal that is maybe just a bit bigger than what you might have planned to eat, don't be selfish - share! Dogs love this meal too (go easy on the really hot green chili and beans with your canine pals... Need I say more?)

Beer Can Chicken

Whole chickens are almost always cheaper than the parts all cut up and packaged. If you know a little bit about how to use a knife and cutting up a chicken you could save some cash if you DIY. Know how to break a bird down but just aren't in the mood for the job? Why not cook it whole?

What you need:

1 whole chicken, plucked, head, neck and innards removed
1 empty beer can, top removed
1/2 stick butter
3/4 of a can of beer
teaspoon dried rosemary
teaspoon dried sage
two cloves garlic, minced

How it's done:

Butter, spices, and beer go in the can. Can goes on the grill (preferably in the smoker), chicken "sits" on the can. Cook low and slow using indirect heat on the grill with the lid closed (if you do this in the smoker then 'nuff said). Don't check for an hour to ensure that it gets a good start and the liquid in the can has a chance to combine and reduce. After an hour look in every 15 minutes or so until it is done to your liking.

Add or delete spices, cover the bird in a dry rub or BBQ sauce if you want. Don't like beer (what the hell is wrong with you?!), try wine or chicken stock instead. One of the easiest ways I know to cook a whole chicken, even better you can eat it with your hands right off the grill so clean up is dead easy! Got a duck, goose, or turkey? Get a bigger can (Fosters or other large can) and give it a shot. My experience is that turkeys take a lot longer but the outcome is wonderful, never tried it with a duck or a goose but it ought to work...

Here's a meal that will help you remain single!

The Mother In Law Sandwich

What you need:

Hot dog bun or similar bread

Can of high quality tamales (think store brand or Ellis Bros)

Canned chili, Hormel no beans and hot is my favorite but generic is good too, just carve off the layer of grease on top when you open the can with a spoon of your fingers... The dog will enjoy that (don't tell the vet I said that!)! dog

One can of bean dip, again, the quality of this ingredient is vital so get the generic brand or maybe even spring for the Frito-Lay version (let's face it, we ain't gonna pair this meal with a fine wine like Boone's Farm, Cold Duck, or quality barley soda such as Miller High Life - who has that kind of cash?!).

Coleslaw or potato salad (optional, been to a Country Buffet or other all you can eat before they close establishment with some ziplock bags in your pockets lately?)

Cheese, nacho is good but Kraft singles work

Jalapeno slices!!!! Don't skimp on these and make sure they are scorchers!

Git'r done

Open the cans of chili and tamales and nuke the contents to desired degree of done-ness but pour em outta the can on to a paper plate or two (or not, the sparks are pretty!). If you have a glass bowl or other "microwave safe" dish (whatever that is) and you are willing to chuck it when your are done or , shudder - wash it, then use that. Think about it before you toss an empty margarine tub, you could save it and cook in it and then toss it! No need to clean it first, just keep the empty in the chill chest until needed!

High quality canned tamales come wrapped in wax paper so you probably ought'a peel em before you eat em but I suppose cellulose is a form of fiber... Consider your fiber intake, if you need more here is an easy source! Don't forget the sauce in the can!! Fat is flavor and there will be plenty of both in the can the tamales come from, that's a real sign of quality!

Place bun(s) on another paper plate (I know what you are thinking, three paper plates for one meal? Trust me it's worth it!). Slather bean dip on the bun(s) and insert heated tamale(s), top with cheese, chili, jalapeno slices, and slaw or spud salad (if desired).

Enjoy! The experience of consuming one or more of these while considering the namesake is an experience; I call it Marriage Repellent! Best paired with large quantities of the favorite libations of working people, Buckhorn, Meisterbrau, and generic 3.2 beer are your best choice for this dish (let's face it, you'd need to be hammered to eat more than one of these!)! Trust me, the aftermath will turn your Girl or Boy friend against you and even your dog may question your identity for as many as the next 48 hours! I'd advise removing the batteries from your smoke detectors and avoiding open flame for at least 24 hours, longer if you consume three or more (who could or would?!).

*The author is not responsible for any clogged toilets or other toxic emissons. Individuals that assemble and consume the sandwich known as "The Mother In Law" are solely responsible for their own well being, any resulting damage to property, personnel, livestock, and the environment.

Sounds like just the thing before attending a long graduation ceremony!