Just so you all know

Sunshine Girl wrote:

major bean wrote:

Sunshine Girl wrote:

major bean wrote: Good parenting includes protecting your child from social scrutiny. A parent should never voluntarily say publicly or privately that their child has a personality, character, or mental problem.

This is not in the best interest of the child and it may follow him/her for the rest of life, in commerce, with the government, and in relationship with civil liberties. Certain things should be kept private.

I'm going to have to respectfully disagree with you here MB. You sound like SC should be ashamed or embarrassed because her child suffers with something that MANY other people have too. I don't believe that there is ANYTHING that needs to be swept under the rug or only dealt with privately. Quite on the contrary in fact. Let's take Alzheimers disease for a different example. This is something that effects older people instead of younger people. If my parent was afflicted with this ailment I would not be embarrassed or ashamed either. I believe the only way to NOT stigmatize people is for people to talk about it and share their experiences in dealing with it. Also by not sweeping it under the carpet do we make it a very real issue that we NEED TO talk about and find a cure or ways of alleviating some of the symptoms it causes. There is NO SHAME when anyone has a disorder, disease, or condition. As a society our first responsibility to ourselves and our neighbors should be compassion and understanding. But that is just my opinion. When you look at the situation in the way of "Good parenting includes protecting your child from social scrutiny. A parent should never voluntarily say publicly or privately that their child has a personality, character, or mental problem" then it is no wonder we have bullying in schools, a partial close-minded society, and a lack of compassion to our fellow human beings.

That post concerned the child. To hell with how the parent feels. The child's best interest is what the parent should have in her/his heart.

If a parent has issues with what problems that their child may have, then the parent has some major issues.

When the parent shows the child that there is no reason to be ashamed then the child is NOT ashamed. Most parent's hearts are in the right place I'm sure. It is the rest of society (some) that have the real problems. Deal with that!

That is nonsense. Whenever a child enters adolescence they need very little provocation to find issues with which to rebel against the world. Giving them a very difficult self image very early in life is extremely bad. You might as well go out and beat them every day of their young life.

Young minds do not consider and receive things as would an adult. You have forgotten what it is like to be a child. How pitiful.

VL, you know how to pick a topic!

Please consider this:
I did not introduce personal information into this thread. That information was voluntarily given in an attempt at debate bullying, trying to make an opponent to back down by introducing personal info and making the issue a personal attack. This tactic of bullying was discussed in another thread by all the liberals involved here.
If you have any intellectual intergrity, you would recognize what was done by this introduction of personal information, and repent.
I have tried to keep to the subject and discuss the issue. The postured indignation about a personal attack has continued. Please refer to the thread "Our Discussion....."

Major Bean wrote: VL, you know how to pick a topic!

I think that is the only thing said by Major Bean in this thread that I agree with!

MB, you don't think for a moment that I AM bullying you do you?????? I have not either introduced personal information into this thread so I don't know who that is directed to. Not that if I had personal info to post I would hesitate though. VL posted a good topic, that I agree with.

No, ScienceChic introduced this as an attempt to trump my post saying that it was poor parenting.

major bean wrote:

Sunshine Girl wrote:

major bean wrote:

Sunshine Girl wrote:

major bean wrote: Good parenting includes protecting your child from social scrutiny. A parent should never voluntarily say publicly or privately that their child has a personality, character, or mental problem.

This is not in the best interest of the child and it may follow him/her for the rest of life, in commerce, with the government, and in relationship with civil liberties. Certain things should be kept private.

I'm going to have to respectfully disagree with you here MB. You sound like SC should be ashamed or embarrassed because her child suffers with something that MANY other people have too. I don't believe that there is ANYTHING that needs to be swept under the rug or only dealt with privately. Quite on the contrary in fact. Let's take Alzheimer's disease for a different example. This is something that effects older people instead of younger people. If my parent was afflicted with this ailment I would not be embarrassed or ashamed either. I believe the only way to NOT stigmatize people is for people to talk about it and share their experiences in dealing with it. Also by not sweeping it under the carpet do we make it a very real issue that we NEED TO talk about and find a cure or ways of alleviating some of the symptoms it causes. There is NO SHAME when anyone has a disorder, disease, or condition. As a society our first responsibility to ourselves and our neighbors should be compassion and understanding. But that is just my opinion. When you look at the situation in the way of "Good parenting includes protecting your child from social scrutiny. A parent should never voluntarily say publicly or privately that their child has a personality, character, or mental problem" then it is no wonder we have bullying in schools, a partial close-minded society, and a lack of compassion to our fellow human beings.

That post concerned the child. To hell with how the parent feels. The child's best interest is what the parent should have in her/his heart.

If a parent has issues with what problems that their child may have, then the parent has some major issues.

When the parent shows the child that there is no reason to be ashamed then the child is NOT ashamed. Most parent's hearts are in the right place I'm sure. It is the rest of society (some) that have the real problems. Deal with that!

That is nonsense. Whenever a child enters adolescence they need very little provocation to find issues with which to rebel against the world. Giving them a very difficult self image very early in life is extremely bad. You might as well go out and beat them every day of their young life.

Young minds do not consider and receive things as would an adult. You have forgotten what it is like to be a child. How pitiful.

This is our point of disconnect: You feel that leading by example of an informed way of dealing with a medical issue that a child might have is giving them a "very difficult self image" where as I feel that sometimes in our life we are presented with personal (medical) challenges (that can come upon us at any stage in our life) and that is just part of life we have to learn how to deal with to our best ability. I don't perceive negative connotations like you do. Simple really. And I have to LOL when you say "you have forgotten what it is like to be a child." Exactly how many young children to you still have living at home? I have three. There are times when I'd like to forgot though. Just kidding so don't freak out ok. I can't wrap my mind around (thankfully of course) how treating a child's medical needs equates (hopefully only in your mind) to "you might as well go out and beat them every day of their young life." :VeryScared: OMG! By the way, I am such a pitiful mom too (I join the elite ranks of Archer and SC - among many others I'm sure....yeah me!) that I made my kids endure a three week vacation in Hawaii. Extreme torture I know. lol


I tell you, I am dying to have a dinner party and invite people that I don't see eye-to-eye with regarding politics, religion, child rearing, etc. I bet we have a blast anyways and find that we have more alike than we have differences.

We are not dealing with a child with a medical issue, but, rather, a personality issue. You are not telling a child that they have a physical abnormality but that "he", "who he is", "what he is", "his very being" is not as everyone else. That his very being is not normal. This is extremely profound to a child. It is an insidious "cancer" that grows within the child until it eventually overcomes him and he becomes a problem to himself and to others.

Sure they are sweet children today. Even those who are abused are sweet children. The effects take time to twist the child into what they become in adulthood.

If nothing else, his school records will follow him until the day he dies. He will be denied certain jobs with the government. Whenever he fills out a form for a permit, job, or whatever, he must answer the mental health question with the answer that he has been diagnosed with mental problems. This is a giant albatross around his neck.

I have to say that this was IMO a very interesting debate. I apologize if my statement earlier was interpreted to be an indictment of SC. It definitely wasn't meant to be. Actually in most replies this was one of the most maturely handled debates in quite awhile.

major bean wrote: We are not dealing with a child with a medical issue, but, rather, a personality issue. You are not telling a child that they have a physical abnormality but that "he", "who he is", "what he is", "his very being" is not as everyone else. That his very being is not normal. This is extremely profound to a child. It is an insidious "cancer" that grows within the child until it eventually overcomes him and he becomes a problem to himself and to others.

Sure they are sweet children today. Even those who are abused are sweet children. The effects take time to twist the child into what they become in adulthood.

If nothing else, his school records will follow him until the day he dies. He will be denied certain jobs with the government. Whenever he fills out a form for a permit, job, or whatever, he must answer the mental health question with the answer that he has been diagnosed with mental problems. This is a giant albatross around his neck.

Qote from http://www.adhdquestionsandanswers.com/ ... ......ADHD stands for “Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder”. It is a medical condition in which a child displays hyperactive, distractible, impulsive and/or inattentive behaviour which is generally considered not appropriate for children their age. In layman’s terms, this means that the child has difficulty in paying attention and staying focused on most tasks given to them. They also tend to move around a lot and are very fidgety (making unnecessary fuss).
Hence, it is understandable that a child with ADHD often have problems in school, socializing with their friends, or listening and following their parents’ instructions.
ADHD is regarded as a physical problem, not an emotional one. This is because it is a result of some chemical imbalance in the brain. It is believed that external factors do not cause ADHD. They only affect how the symptoms come to light. Examples of external factors include a difficult family environment, inadequate parenting, divorce or stresses in school.

I hope your wrong in your assessment of society will look at children and adults who suffer from ADHD. I'm sure some people feel as you do and some feel as I do. I just hope that when people need understanding and compassion they are fortunate enough to be around those with an open mind.